A friend’s comment on Twitter caught my attention the other day for two reasons. First, she’s a rare presence there. Second, her message made me a little angry. And my reaction surprised me.
Why would I react so strongly to a random tweet from someone I’ve been friends with for years? She didn’t say anything offensive. “Please go to some website and vote for my company in some contest that you’ve never heard of.” But after a few moments, it started to make sense why this hit me so wrong.
While she has great personal social capital with me, she has none on Twitter. She didn’t earn my permission to ask for this favor in this place in this manner. And if she got this reaction from me, she definitely got it from most of her other followers.
A quick look into the seminal research done on the science of persuasion by Dr. Robert Cialdini helps explain my reaction; it also helps us avoid the most common social media mistakes. His research delves into the social psychology of persuasion, describing how we can employ the naturally available “decision triggers” that get us invited “inside the walls” so our requests can be heard. This matters to marketers – and is of paramount importance when we talk about social media.
Where much of traditional advertising leans on the principles related to motivation and making choices under conditions of uncertainty, social media lives in the world of relationship building.
Both principles in this area – “reciprocity” and “liking” – set the stage for making requests. We employ “reciprocity” in social media because it is by definition a dialog, not a monologue. We comment, they comment. We engage, they engage. We give our readers a gift, triggering the very human social obligation to reciprocate. This means what we write needs to be valuable and relevant to the reader. Throughout this budding relationship, we foster “liking.” People help those they know and like. When your personality comes through in your writing – and people like what they read – they “know” you, and by extension, your brand. This means how we write is as important as what we write.
With proper attention given to the establishment of the relationship, we’re all happy to help you with your request. After all, we’ve learned so much from you. We like you. Why wouldn’t we vote for your company to get that award we’ve never heard of on that website we’ve never gone to before?
Social media is “social” first. We give before we receive. We make friends. Without these steps, we’re just broadcasting. Even when we’re talking to friends.
Stephen Denny ([email protected]) is the president of Denny Marketing.
Network
