Stupid Bureaucrat Watch: College Threatens over Initials in E-mail

Santa Rosa Junior College in California has sent an unmistakable signal that some bureaucrats there have way too much time on their hands by reportedly threatening legal action against students and faculty with private e-mail accounts that use the college’s initials in their construction.

The college is attempting to stamp out Yahoo, Google and other e-mail accounts that include the letters “SRJC” or the words “Santa Rosa Junior College” in the user’s name, such as [email protected], Sonoma County’s Press Democrat reported.

According to the Press Democrat, to enforce the policy, administrators cited an obscure educational code they said makes it “illegal” for students and faculty to use the school’s acronym without permission.

The college threatened legal action against anyone who doesn’t comply, the Press Democrat reported.

In an e-mail to faculty, Mary Kay Rudolph, vice president of academic affairs, reportedly wrote the following:

“Let’s say I’m a student named Mary Kay Rudolph and I have a Yahoo account,” she reportedly wrote. “But, instead of asking to be [email protected] I am [email protected]. Or, I am [email protected]. Those are both illegal.”

Oh, bullshit.

Reached by telephone, a public relations representative at the college verified the Press Democrat story’s accuracy, then forwarded the call to Santa Rosa Junior College’s president’s office, which did not respond to a request for comment defending its ridiculous e-mail policy.

In any case, I wanted to take this opportunity to let Magilla Marketing’s readers know I’ve started a new association.

It’s called Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College.

Like much that is published in this newsletter, Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College’s aim is to do not much of anything other than irritate someone who’s begging for it.

I’ve also appointed myself president of Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College.

To handle the affairs of Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College, I’ve set up a special e-mail address: [email protected].

Feel free to e-mail me there.

I am also urging readers to join Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College by setting up special e-mail accounts of their own with the letters SRJC in them.

There will be no bylaws or agenda for Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College. There will also be no monthly dues or meetings.

In fact, there will be no meetings of members of Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College’s membership at all—that is, unless you consider the president and one or more members during a marketing conference coincidentally in the same bar getting embarrassingly slopped up over martinis a meeting.

Also, readers should feel free to make up their own Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College councils—such as the SRJC Council for Bureaucrats Who Really Need to Get out More Often—and appoint themselves vice presidents.

Since there are no formal meetings, we’ll need a secret handshake to identify ourselves. Here it is: When a member of Stupid Ridiculous Jackass College meets someone else he or she thinks may be a member, during the handshake, they’ll say loudly, ”I’m an idiot!” If the other person is a member, they’ll respond: “With waaay too much time on my hands!”

Then they’ll finish the handshake by braying like jackasses: “Heeeee Hawwww!”