My vote goes for “Postal Rendition Selectee”.
I’d like to see some real government obscurity added to the Salutation. Something that adds confusion to the whole process. Just as a CIA prisoner being sent to a secret prison is called an “extraordinary rendition,” we could use address labels such as “Mr. George Smith or Postal Rendition Selectee”.
Recipients would have no idea of what you are talking about but would at least feel it meant they were important. It would make one feel that he or she was specifically selected by the USPS. That way there would be no lessening of status for the recipient. Rendition selectee says anything but, “you don’t matter.” It also avoids having to use Mr., Ms., Mrs., or other address dilemmas, and the company would remain blameless because it was the Postal Service which selected who the mailing would go to.
Mail recipients would never figure it out and who knows, maybe some forgotten prisoner in a Baltic secret prison might get his spirits lifted if he got a mail piece directed to him as a Postal Rendition Selectee. He would at least feel that someone cared. And, right before Christmas even Martha would agree that this would be a good thing.
Regards,
Albert Saxon
Saxon Marketing
Indian Orchard, MA
* * * * *
Anyone who has a better phrase is encouraged to share it
Network
