Our current DIY project is redoing our guestroom for our three-year-old son Jacob, so his baby brother Danny can take over the nursery.
My first thought was to go to PotteryBarnKids.com and check out all the nifty coordinated bedding and room accessories. But right on the home page I quickly realized a huge problem: these wares aren’t for real children.
Have you ever met a real child? None are as perfect looking as the tykes pictured, for starters. Add a few smudges of dirt, jelly (or catsup, or better yet, both) and a soupcon of boogers, and they we’re getting a bit closer to life on Planet Toddler.
The room motifs look terrific—but let’s face it: no kid wants all airplanes, bugs or robots, unless they’ve been diagnosed with early OCD. Real kids mix it up. The superheroes ride the dinosaurs as the stormtroopers march with Mr. Potato Head and Elmo to the beat of the Wiggles. Show me the matchy-matchy room with the action figures strewn all over the floor and then I’ll be able to think about what it would actually look like in my home
What Pottery Barn Kids is really selling is the illusion that children live in neat, orderly worlds where they eat things other than chicken nuggets and don’t demand to watch Cartoon Network 24/7. This gingham universe sure looks like a lovely place, but I’ve never been there.
But, ya’ know, one of this really matters anyway. Ever since we told Jacob he could help pick out things for his new room, only two words have come out of his mouth.
“Batman bed.”
But what about the Spider-Man or Superman sets? They’re a little more colorful.
“Batman bed.”
Are you sure? Bob the Builder is nice.
“BATMANNNNN BED!!!!!”
So, we –- not unhappily, I might add – went downscale from Pottery Barn to Target and purchased a Batman comforter and sheet set.
Next is figuring out the wall colors. Anyone know who sells the shade of gray Bruce Wayne had Alfred paint the Batcave?
