USE IT Don't Abuse It

In direct marketing, networking has become a necessary skill to find new customers and make a variety of contacts.

However, networking often has a bad reputation; that is, people do it just to make new contacts so they can have more names in their Rolodex. Or they fail to make a personal connection when following up, and the focus is on quantity of contacts rather than quality. Good relationships are not “work,” and genuine results can't be forced when meeting new people. When quantity overrules quality and is taken to the extreme, it becomes “networking abuse.”

Think about the networking abuse you've seen at weddings, funerals and Direct Marketing Association events, where people will put everyone around them on the spot. Some do it in the name of a company whose reputation becomes tarnished because the “victims” of networking abuse think it's the company that encourages such aggressive behavior. Remember that networking is the process of uniting people for the purpose of exchanging information for the well-being of all involved. If you network to use others for your personal gain by coercing or manipulating them to do what you want, it's negative. Since everyone knows each other in the direct marketing industry, your integrity is critical.

When you attend DMA functions, you probably collect a stack of business cards from list managers and brokers and choose the most important ones you want to follow up with. The next step is to write a friendly note to those promising contacts. However, making an immediate pitch for business is not always appropriate. Also, you have to do more than simply send that note because the relationship has to be maintained over a period of time. For instance, if you want to set up an appointment with a manager or broker, and you call him after months of silence, it might appear unnatural and insincere. The key is to stay in touch and build relationships with direct marketing professionals, from which good results will naturally flow.

When you network, you have to learn to respect others' timetables. Of course, sometimes new contacts don't respond in a timely fashion. They may be busy with their own deadlines and have a lot of responsibilities, and therefore can't respond immediately. So how can you move the process without pushing other people too hard?

If a contact doesn't call back after being given a great introduction or offer, avoid badgering them with demanding follow-up calls. Being harsh or impersonal when calling others can do more harm than good.

These types of calls can best be avoided when earlier conversations include productive questions, such as: “How do you prefer to learn about new products or lists?” or “What's the best way to present the list information?” You can help them move things forward and get the response you want.

Rushing communications can become another stumbling block to networking. This occurs when you hurry off the phone or send correspondence that's not carefully written. It tells the new contact you're going through the process in a mechanical way. Even when you have many people to contact, it takes very little effort to develop a personalized approach. Here are three ways to do it:

• Ask the contact how he or she wants the issue handled. Some people prefer everything be done in writing; others would rather receive a follow-up phone call or e-mail letting them know about opportunities that might be of interest. Put codes in your address book such as “V” for voicemail or “E” for e-mail contacts.

• Check on new contacts regularly. In direct marketing, some people are told to deal with people without having a long-term follow-up plan in place. Often the follow-up is more important. Make a note of the next significant date on your contacts' calendars. You can phone or e-mail them a month before announcements are sent out, or mention that you hope to connect with them at an upcoming trade show.

• Develop a networking game plan. New contacts often don't develop into anything important because there's no long-term plan in place. Keep a list of all readily available contacts. Using that list, develop a plan that's appropriate for all the contacts, and choose the ones that'll get unique treatment. For instance, you may see that effective follow-up with a contact may be to simply look for him or her at an upcoming business function, while another contact might appreciate a note with helpful information. Once you find out what's most effective, build on what works and develop the skills you need, such as writing and speaking to make meaningful connections with those important people.

There are two main areas of focus when using positive networking tactics: how contacts are identified and appropriate follow-up. When you understand how to approach networking from a positive standpoint, you can use techniques specific to each of these contact categories:

1. Satisfied customers

   What better referral? They can be the best advocates because they know what you have to offer. You can ask them to introduce you to other people. Most importantly, thank them with a personal note or phone call.

2. Friends

   You work hard at building friendships that include mutual trust. So, you can find out about your friends' work and try to help them. Then, when the time is right, you can ask them for a referral.

3. Neighbors

   Make the effort to strike up conversations with people in your building or neighborhood. You'll often find that you have common interests.

4. Happy, helpful people

   The kind all of us meet by chance or connect with in unexpected ways. You can meet them on a plane, train, or waiting in line at the movies. I've even met people while waiting in line for the restroom during a direct marketing club luncheon. Life has a funny way of connecting you when you least expect it. You just have to be ready for the opportunity.

5. Your own workplace

   Sometimes the relationships you need to build are located right by your desk. I knew a seasoned list manager who wanted to break ground with a new mailer, and little did he know that the list broker at his own company, with whom he'd hardly spoken, knew the mailer. When the list manager saw the broker at breakfast with the mailer he wanted to meet, he realized how the absence of an internal relationship cost him a crucial introduction. If he would have developed a relationship with his co-worker, the introduction to the client just might've happened.

Follow-up Tactics

Effective networking is based on implementing simple tactics. Here are seven rules of networking to live by:

1. Smile

   A smile is a universal welcome sign. The people you meet for the first time will appreciate your warmth.

2. Look the person in the eye

   It's a compliment to look at someone. It's a way to connect with someone new in the shortest possible time.

3. Listen

   One of the greatest compliments you can give other people is to let them know you're listening to them. Remember, when you network with new contacts it's like reading the paper. Let people tell their stories so you can discover the “news you can use.”

4. Body language

   First impressions are lasting ones. Monitor expressions. Now and then you need to loosen up, because meeting new people can make you tense.

5. Avoid being pushy

   Be careful of coming on too strong or needy. Even if you just lost your last account, avoid appearing desperate.

6. Give genuine compliments

   Yes, even with new contacts, a compliment might be appropriate. When you listen to people carefully, often they will mention something they're proud of. You need to think for a moment and find a way to sincerely acknowledge others' achievements.

7. Business cards are golden

   Ask for people's cards. However, one rule is to only offer yours when requested. When you do get other people's cards, you should treat them as fine treasures and give them the most respect. I've been to many direct marketing conferences where the cards made it only as far as the trash can.

Andrea Nierenberg is president of The Nierenberg Group, New York, and author of “Nonstop Networking: How to Improve Your Life, Luck, and Career.”