WEIGHING IN ON OUTSOURCING
How I wish Ray Schultz was correct in his sunny evaluation of overseas telemarketers (Direct Hit, February).
I have welcomed suggestions that my company use these Indian-based firms for our own direct marketing efforts. As a publisher who now pays $28 an hour to mine for new customers, my mouth waters at the prospect of a $10-an-hour rate reduction, which is what many of these offshore companies offer.
Unfortunately, my own experience with foreign telemarketers has been worse than bad — it's been horrific. Over the past month, I have fielded calls from Indian telemarketers whom I could barely understand. Even worse, the telephone connections are marred by those millisecond delays that are so prevalent in overseas communication. I find that these operators, while polite, simply cannot overcome the problem of speaking clear English.
I am sorry if this sounds politically incorrect, but there it is. Remember, I was hoping for a good experience.
Meanwhile, every feeler I put out to offshore telemarketing companies was mishandled. In one case, a reputable company in India simply stopped writing to me after I asked to monitor a few calls to evaluate their service.
Maybe all of this will change, but for now, I'm sticking to my tried-and-true American company.
Mark Ragan
CEO
Lawrence Ragan Communications Inc.
Chicago
I'm happy to deal with any customer service reps, be they in Omaha or Mumbai, as long as they can help me with my problem. Unfortunately, my experiences with call centers based in India (I guess) are usually frustrating and time consuming.
My wife and I moved back here from the United Kingdom around a year ago — we had some accounts with Citibank in London. Until about a month before we moved, the CS reps based in the U.K. were terrific — couldn't be more helpful and would always go the extra yard. At the time of the move, we had to bring a substantial amount of money over to the States to close our property deal. I called and asked how to do this.
The first suggestion was to go to my local branch. Answer was that we lived 250 miles from London where Citibank was based.
The second suggestion was that they would send me a banker's draft for the amount. “How will you send it?” I asked. “We will put it in the mail,” came the reply. “So,” I observed, “you will send me this large amount of ‘cash’ in the trusted Royal Mail — doesn't that seem risky?” “Yes,” was the reply.
“So how do I get my money?” I asked.
Pause.
“Go to your local branch.”
I've had similar circular conversations with Indian-based AOL reps when I was trying to solve a technical issue.
The real problem with this trend is that the reps can't think beyond the script. Once something comes up that's out of the box, they're lost. At that point it seems they will sit in silence at the other end of the phone rather then pass you up the line to a supervisor.
Another problem Ray didn't mention in his column is that it's difficult at times to understand the accents, especially for older people.
Anyway, it's a pet subject of mine. Whenever I connect to overseas help, my shoulders drop and I have to readjust my mindset for a long battle. Having said that, requests that are on the script are dealt with superbly.
David Whitehead
‘YOU’-PHEMISMS
I enjoy reading Herschell Gordon Lewis every month in Direct, and I got a few good laughs out of his recent column (Curmudgeon-at-Large, February).
I can recall many times seeing some high-profile person being walked out the door of companies I worked at, and then returning to my desk to find a companywide e-mail stating that‥
“So-and-so has left the company effective immediately to pursue other interests.” Gee, did they just win the Mega Millions lottery?
Or the people who were let go and told they were “not a good fit.” Apparently, these were the same people who were asking too many questions and looking into matters where they shouldn't have.
And I always laugh at those diet ads. Years ago in my younger days, I would tape some late-night movies for later viewing. Herschell's comments caused me to recall two commercials:
One, for a product called Dream Away. Eat what you want all day then take this medicine and melt away fat while sleeping each night. Guaranteed to lose 10 pounds or more overnight. Yes, right. If someone came in and chopped off my leg or arm while I was sleeping, then I would agree.
The other ad was for a “fat-buster girdle.” It was about 12 inches wide and appeared to be made out of thick carpet runner that contained many protruding prongs about 0.5 inch in diameter and an inch tall that one would wrap tight around themselves all day to reduce their appetite. The prongs would be facing inward, toward your stomach.
When I saw it, I thought it might curb one's appetite (worse than being in a straitjacket), but would be counterproductive by promoting violence when someone explodes with that thing on. (in any way one can imagine)
Where would these ads be without those famous “unretouched” before-and-after photos?
Keep those great columns coming, Herschell. Your words are right on the money!
Ethel T. Olcsvay
East Brunswick, NJ
I've been a fan of Herschell Gordon Lewis' Curmudgeon-at-Large column ever since I started reading Direct about six years ago. But this latest one was just hilarious. It really had me rolling with laughter.
Thanks for a great column and a great magazine.
Si Chen
Regarding February's Curmudgeon-at-Large: I laughed my ass off = I laughed my ass off because it's so true…
Sid Korob
SO MUCH FOR CLEVER
My comments run in two parts: one is a response to Mr. Fitzgerald of San Diego and to Mr. Houchens of Kentucky (Letters to the Editor, February); the other to Tom Collins' February makeover of the Braun ad.
If Mr. Fitzgerald thinks the original Atkins ad is “exemplary work” and Mr. Houchens feels the same ad is “a fairly decent ad,” I wonder what their interpretation of a bad ad would be? Rosser Reeves said “it's now or never” when the reader fixes his eyes on that page. The original Atkins ad (The Makeover Maven, January) has no word power, no benefit power and is poorly laid out. It's a classic case where the creatives have fallen in love with their own reputation (read Fitzgerald) and have overwhelmed the “sales” message with innocuous art and layout. Look at the examples in the Advertising Hall of Fame or read the “classics” by some of the best copywriters in the industry and then tell me that Tom's makeover, though not 100% there, does not stand head and shoulders above the original.
Tom's makeover for Braun's ad falls in the same category. The original does not stop the reader with either word power or visual impact. In fact, it looks like an engineering ad in a trade catalog. Don't show me the guts of a tool — who cares? — but tell me what it will do for me.
Tom applies the same principles here that he used for the Atkins and Charles Schwab ads (The Makeover Maven, December 2004). Principles that over the years have proven successful. Principles that have been tested time and time again. Principles that have even been ignored — but by admen who know how and when one could bend the rules.
The Braun makeover tells me at a glance (and my time and attention span is valuable) that it's about a shaver made by a well-known company whose logo I recognize right off the bat. Again the formula: simple two-column ad; a photo that helps the message and doesn't confuse the issue; copy that grabs the viewer with sales language and which is cleverly aided by indentations and subheads (in bold and lowercase); and the Web site address is right there, above the logo — not buried at the bottom right-hand corner.
Good work, Tom! And as you point out to us, clever is seldom convincing.
Valentine Chmel
Honolulu
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