I’m going to start this column with a favorite joke, which also happens to be a naughty joke. Readers susceptible to attacks of the vapors should skip ahead to the fourth paragraph.
Question: Why do southern belles hate orgies?
Answer: Because of all the thank-you notes they have to write afterward.
As a result of writing Loose Cannon during the past six and one half years, I’ve had an opportunity to write a lot of thank-you notes. For a writer, there is little more gratifying than an intelligent reaction, even – especially – if that intelligent reaction is a disagreement. Nearly everyone who penned a response to one of my columns (there are a few exceptions, and to those individuals I apologize) has received a thank you, regardless of whether or not I received permission to share their letters with the general public.
While it’s been my byline atop each column, there are a few non-Direct folk who deserve many, many accolades for all their help throughout the years. One, who due to circumstances beyond anyone’s control must remain anonymous, has a genuinely evil sense of humor, as well as a facile way with words.
Jackie Ball, my dear friend and writing partner, is one of the best editors outside of Penton I’ve ever worked with. In addition to adding a bit of cayenne pepper to the columns, Jackie has also cleared up a lot of mushy thinking on my part. When I ramble, it’s because I haven’t taken her advice.
During the last six-plus years, Pelda B. Hyman has become one of the harshest editors I could hope to work with – because she knows that a sharp criticism is far more gentle than letting sloppy writing get through. A mother’s love is a wonderful thing. Thanks, Mom.
Within Direct, editors up and down the masthead have given support, guidance, cover, essential editing and the occasional groan. Editorial director Ray Schultz has also offered an amazing amount of latitude in terms of topics and tone. This is the greatest compliment a columnist could ever receive.
Allowing for time off and repeats, I’ve written – and the above have collectively edited – more than 300 columns. As an old friend once described a guide to Congressional foibles I wrote some years back, “This is the product of an obsessed, yet utterly insignificant, mind.” That’s been a pretty good mission statement for Loose Cannon, especially for someone who thinks mission statements should be carved into Lucite paperweights which are then dropped into the nearest volcano.
It’s time for this column to take an indefinite hiatus. It’s time to turn my obsessed, yet utterly insignificant mind to other projects, including pulling together an anthology of Loose Cannon columns and extra commentary and poking around the business trade press for a publisher. And there are a few outside writing projects to which I’d like to turn my hand.
But the most immediate project is a new offering from Direct Newsline’s parent brand, Chief Marketer. This week, Chief Marketer is launching The Big Fat Marketing Blog, an amalgam of news and commentary from the editorial staffs of Direct, Multichannel Merchant and Promo magazines. Under the steady hand of Beth Negus Viveiros, the Web editor for the Chief Marketer Network, the blog will pull together the divergent voices from all of these properties. You can see for yourself by clicking here: http://bigfatmarketingblog.com.
Again, many thanks to the readers, correspondents, brickbat-throwers and kudos-givers who have made the last six-plus years so much fun. I’m looking forward to whatever’s next.
